Mommy

String searching algorithmImage via Wikipedia

There Is No Box

Let me tell you about my mommy. She’s the little woman who used to call me “sweetheart” when I was so small I was scared to fall asleep. She’s the one who played me to sleep each night, the one who taught me to love Bach, Mozart, and Handel while I slept. She’s the one who, way back in the 60s, sometimes worked 2 jobs to make sure we were fed, with a roof over our heads. I remember all of that.

Sure, she had help at times. Grandparents on both sides came to the rescue more than once, but when the cold curtain of night fell across the Carolina countryside, it was her we clung to and counted on. It was her who taught us to think as if there were no box, no inside or outside, no limits at all except those we set for ourselves. She is the one who gave me and all my brothers and sisters the ability to think. She is the 1st person who ever told me to stand for what I believed, and to always question that belief, so I would know for sure just what my life stood for.

She doesn’t know how important she is to the world. She is one of the most humble people I have ever met. She is beautiful. She is a thinker and yet she has fun with life. She once told me, after taking me to a Yes concert in 1973, that I had good taste in music. She actually went home, set a record on the turntable, and listened to them.

She worries that she failed us, because of things over which she had no control. She worries that somehow, on one day or another, she missed some rare opportunity to be The Greatest Mommy of all time. She has no reason to worry, she just does.

The Greatest Mommy of All Time

My mommy gave birth to 7 rambunctious and sometimes frustrating children. By 1965 she was a single mom. In those days, it was a social stigma almost impossible to deal with. Nowadays, it’s just the social norm. She is a true Superwoman, though. Statistically, we kids should have grown up with a profound social bias against us. Statistically, at least one of us should not have lived to be an adult. Statistically at least 2 more of us should have died by now.

But look at us instead: One of us lives in Indonesia, having served as Chief of Party USAID (and now is a leader in the World Wildlife Federation). One of us is Vice President of a multi-million dollar construction manufacturing firm. One of us is CFO of another multi-million dollar construction company. One of us is a Project Manager for multi-million dollar construction projects in the DC metro area. One of us chose to make the Air Force a career, will retire soon after returning from his final visit to Iraq. One of us manages a prosperous medical office. We have each succeeded, not just by the world’s standards, but by our own as well.

She might have made mistakes. If so, I won’t tell it. I look at the results of her life and all I see is good stuff. She’s 72 years old and until very recently was teaching English as a 2nd language, tutoring both adults and children. She’s still active in her church, and I mean with the people, not with the building or the dogma. She Lives her faith. She still bakes delectable cakes (which she has never eaten!) and sells them so cheaply you have to wonder why she does it. She is always there for anyone in need, whether she knows them or not. Who knows what goes on in her mind, why she seems to keep giving and giving and giving… like that little bunny on TV, she just never stops.

I guess the answer is so clear as to be nearly invisible. She still cares.

I look in the mirror and I am glad I see her eyes.

I am Jon, 3rd-of-7, and I love you, Mommy.

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Rewritten from 2008

The Domino Effect

They All Fall Down – Except The Ones That Fall Up

Found this via a tweet from Nancy Hennen aka @ViewsNews – I highly recommend you follow her tweets. She’ll do her best to keep you up with the (real) news of the day, plus anything that’s got a good fun-factor.

Like this video below…

Dominoes Everywhere from Jared Lyon on Vimeo.

The video was posted to the web by @Jared Lyon, who writes this on the hosting page:

This video was created for Imagine RIT, an annual festival at Rochester Institute of Technology focused on creativity and innovation of its students, faculty, and staff. It was created by myself and two coworkers.

The cardboard man at the beginning who kicks the first domino is RIT President Bill Destler, who started the annual festival at RIT in 2008.

Inspiration for the video came from some of my favorite videos including the Sony Bravia balls, paint, and rabbits commercials; the Honda cog commercial; the Guinness ‘Tipping Point’ commercial; and all of FlippyCat’s domino videos on YouTube.

Special thanks to everyone in RIT University Publications who helped with setup and cleanup.

Thanks Jared. And thank you Nancy. You were right… this is one of the best Domino setups I have ever seen.

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If I Ever Lose My Faith

In You

Has it really been 24 years? I truly never expected so much time to pass without us. To put it mildly, to understate it emphatically, to whisper it to the world so they all will hear

I miss you.

You have a birthday this week, proving once again that some women really do get better with the passage of time. I wish I could celebrate it with you, but since I cannot, I hope you’ll take just a few minutes, enjoy this video by Sting and know that I am thinking of you…

If I Ever Lose My Faith In You – Sting

You could say I lost my faith in science and progress
You could say I lost my belief in the holy church
You could say I lost my sense of direction
You could say all of this and worse but

If I ever lose my faith in you
There’d be nothing left for me to do

Some would say I was a lost man in a lost world
You could say I lost my faith in the people on TV
You could say I’d lost my belief in our politicians
They all seemed like game show hosts to me

If I ever lose my faith in you
There’d be nothing left for me to do

I could be lost inside their lies without a trace
But every time I close my eyes I see your face

I never saw no miracle of science
That didn’t go from a blessing to a curse
I never saw no military solution
That didn’t always end up as something worse but
Let me say this first

If I ever lose my faith in you
There’d be nothing left for me to do

I am Jon, and I miss you.
(Happy birthday!)

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Biopsy Boy

purple mushroomsImage by yewenyi via Flickr

Hey folks,

Wanted to fill you in on the consult I had Friday with the oncologist.
PET Scan shows very positive for cancer in my lungs but
Biopsy returned 3 (three) negative results for cancer.

Shrooms?

What they DID find was a fungal infection which is associated with a common bacteria to which humans are normally immune. This bacteria lives literally everywhere on the planet, and is therefore very common.

For some reason last year(apparently) my immune system suffered some deterioration and the bacteria was able to establish a stronghold in my lungs. It’s this which caused the fungal infection, with symptoms very much like pneumonia. I will be seeing someone who is a specialist in these types of diseases on Monday. I am already taking a specific antibiotic to combat the bacteria.

Biopsy Boy

Other than that there are 3 lymph nodules of interest in/near my upper respiratory tract which also indicated in the PET scan may be cancerous, determined by the high uptake of dyes. At least one of these, if proven to be cancerous, would be considered inoperable. I will be scheduled for another biopsy within the next couple of days.

Since the 1st biopsy returned no cancer cells, it appears that the cancer in my left lung may be surrounded by the fungal growth, which in the end is a great thing as it would mean that most likely this cancer has been detected within only a few months of its presenting.

The survival rate for patients diagnosed with lung cancer at my age is very low, ( less than 3% live 12+months after diagnosis) but that is because most cases in that demographic are diagnosed in a late stage of the condition. If I am right, and the cancer is very young, my chances of survival increase exponentially.

Depending, of course, on the exact form of the cancer, whether small-cell or non small-cell. (Small cell is inoperable at every stage.)

Progress

I think the order it came to be is something like this:

I caught a flu virus, was sick as hell for about a month beginning Nov 07.

Right after that I caught another DIFFERENT flu virus and was sick about another month beginning late Dec 07.

I think I inhaled some foreign substance, possible while cleaning computers ( a common task) while I was getting over that flu.

The substance lodged in my lung and created a mild ‘walking’ pneumonia that kept flaring up every 3-4 weeks until last Aug, when I experienced a partial lung collapse. During this time, I think my immune system became weaker due to constantly fighting this pneumonia.

As the system grew weaker, an avenue was created for the bacteria to gain a foothold in the weakest part – my lung.

I think the reason for the collapsed lung was the fungal growth caused by the bacterial infection.

After that, I drastically reduced my smoking and felt slightly better for a month or so, then in late October last year became seriously ill to the point of being bedridden for a few weeks. I think the cancer was allowed to start right about then, while my immune system was nearly completely dead.

Between the fungal growth and the cancer, I developed a massive amount of infection in my lungs. When I drank all that moonshine in Nov and it made me feel better, I think that perhaps I had just flushed much of that infection out of me. The stuff I coughed up back then was thick, nasty and mostly black. Naturally I would feel better for awhile after that, until the infection built back up and completely closed most of my airways again. Which is what drove me to the doctors this time.

Anyway… you can see that there are still no definitive answer(s) just yet. I was really hoping there would be something a bit more concrete to tell you, but as this thing progresses it appears that more questions are revealed. Bottom line is this: more tests next week and the following week, most likely some surgery and then it’s all smooth groove after that.

I am Jon, walking through the weather, as are we all.

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The Enemy Within (Not Giving In)

Grace Under Pressure

The Enemy Within

Things crawl in the darkness
That imagination spins
Needles at your nerve ends
Crawl like spiders on your skin

Pounding in your temples
And a surge of adrenaline
Every muscle tense to fence the enemy within

I’m not giving in to security under pressure
I’m not missing out on the promise of adventure
I’m not giving up on implausible dreams
Experience to extremes
Experience to extremes…

Suspicious looking stranger
Flashes you a dangerous grin
Shadows across your window…
Was it only trees in the wind?

Every breath a static charge,
A tongue that tastes like tin
Steely-eyed outside to hide the enemy within

To you, is it movement or is it action?
Is it contact or just reaction?
And you…revolution or just resistance?
Is it living, or just existence?
Yeah, you! It takes a little more persistence
To get up and go the distance

I am Jon – not giving up on implausible dreams.

The Weapon (Artists)

Rush

Artists

Pay attention to artists. They will tell you… things. Things you want to know.

Then again, the dumb crap at the beginning of the video makes you wonder.

I am Jon, but am I an artist?

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Checkity-Check Yourself

For Your Sunday Viewing Pleasure

Thanks to Calculated Risk

Remember – Every time these guys squeeze out another 100 billion dollars, that’s 100 billion dollars of THEIR DEBT TRANSFERRED SQUARELY ONTO YOUR SHOULDERS.

Goldman Sachs, JPMorgan, Citi, Wells Fargo, Bank of America, AIG, GMAC should ALL be forced to fail. These are the guys who really created this mess, and they are the guys who are successfully transferring all of their debts onto you and me and William and Francois and Achmed and Kim and Igor and…

By the way, how do you like the ‘change’? A tax-evader running the IRS and another one in the queue… yay obama? And that 800 billion dollar ‘stimulus’? That’s 800 very large bills transferred to you, and by bills I mean the kind you are responsible for paying.

I am Jon. I’m having enough trouble paying MY debts, to hell with them.

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Do The Exact Right Thing At All Possible Times

“Bernoulli’s Gift”

Expected Value = (Odds of Gain) X (Value of Gain)

This is, generally speaking, a pretty good way to make decisions. It doesn’t just apply to money, it can apply to everything in our lives. It probably does, whether we know it or not. Plus it has the added quality of being easy.

Or does it? If it’s so easy, why do we have such trouble making the right decision? Why is it so difficult for us, individually and as a national and global Whole, to do the right thing?

Dan Gilbert does a great job discussing that problem. The video is about 23 minutes, with a Q&A session lasting about 10 minutes at the end. I’m betting if you sit through the 1st part, you will definitely want to check out the Q&A at the end. It’s a holiday – you’ve got time…

http://www.ted.com/index.php/talks/dan_gilbert_researches_happiness.html

OOPS! The embedded video stopped working. Click the link above for a great presentation.

I’m going to watch this again, I think.

I mean, seriously – this is an awesome video.

Thanks to Barry at The Big Picture.

I hope everyone’s holiday is going well.

I am Jon, sitting right beneath the weather.

Creative Juices

The Future Of Advertising

“There’s alot of people pontificatin’ about the future of advertisin’ and TV and all that sort of thing, but I say you can’t go wrong with a good idea.”

From RubberRepublic, contributed via TouTube:

‘Behind the scenes tour of of an award-winning creative farm, juicing process and distribution in South West England.

The South West produces some of the UK’s finest creative work (animation, web design, design, fashion, architecture….) Now you know why….nice conditions, space to breathe and opportunities with some of the best firms around.’

heh heh… I especially like the quote:

‘No! Don’t bloody drink it! Crise, it’d blow your bloody head off, that would!’

Thanks to Paul Isakson for pointing us in this general direction.

I am Jon, just brimming with creative juices.

Image 19

Remember: Floyd Red Crow Westerman

August 17, 1936 – December 13, 2007

When you meet a stranger in a strange land
greet him as a friend, for we are all one family.
One Tribe, One Nation, One World.

There Is No End To Life

From his song “They Didn’t Listen“:

“And i told them not to dig for gold for if they did, the eagle would die. They didn’t listen, they didn’t listen, they didn’t listen to me. And I told ’em if the eagle died There would be no keeper of the land. They didn’t listen. And if there was no keeper of the land, Machine would come and soon destroy the sky. They didn’t listen… And I told them if they destroy the land, man would have to move into the sea. They didn’t listen… And I told them if they destroy the sea — they didn’t listen…”

I am Jon. I listen. I remember.

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Jethro Tull

This Sunday includes a short history lesson, a Tull video from 1978, some short comments about the band and a personal note to some of my favorite folks. I hope you make time to enjoy…

The Namesake

From the Wikipedia entry:

[Jethro] Tull was born in Basildon, Berkshire to Dorothy Buckridge and Jethro Tull and baptised there on March 30, 1674 [1]. He matriculated at St John’s College, Oxford at the age of 17 but appears to have not taken a degree. He was later educated at Gray’s Inn.

He became sick with a pulmonary disorder, and as he went in a search for a cure he travelled Europe seeking more knowledge of agriculture. Influenced by the early Age of Enlightenment, he is considered to be one of the early proponents of a scientific (and especially empirical) approach to agriculture. He helped transform agricultural practices by inventing or improving numerous implements.

Tull also advocated the use of horses over oxen, invented a horse-drawn hoe for clearing weeds, and made changes to the design of the plough which are still visible in modern versions.

Tull’s inventions were sometimes considered controversial and were not widely adopted for many years. However, on the whole he introduced innovations which contributed to the foundation of productive modern agriculture.

Heavy Horses

Heavy Horses
by Jethro Tull

Iron-clad feather-feet pounding the dust
An October’s day, towards evening
Sweat embossed veins standing proud to the plough
Salt on a deep chest seasoning
Last of the line at an honest day’s toil
Turning the deep sod under
Flint at the fetlock, chasing the bone
Flies at the nostrils plunder.

The Suffolk, the Clydesdale, the Percheron vie
with the Shire on his feathers floating
Hauling soft timber into the dusk
to bed on a warm straw coating.

Heavy Horses, move the land under me
Behind the plough gliding — slipping and sliding free
Now you’re down to the few
And there’s no work to do
The tractor’s on its way.

Let me find you a filly for your proud stallion seed
to keep the old line going.
And we’ll stand you abreast at the back of the wood
behind the young trees growing
To hide you from eyes that mock at your girth,
and your eighteen hands at the shoulder
And one day when the oil barons have all dripped dry
and the nights are seen to draw colder
They’ll beg for your strength, your gentle power
your noble grace and your bearing
And you’ll strain once again to the sound of the gulls
in the wake of the deep plough, sharing.

Standing like tanks on the brow of the hill
Up into the cold wind facing
In stiff battle harness, chained to the world
Against the low sun racing
Bring me a wheel of oaken wood
A rein of polished leather
A Heavy Horse and a tumbling sky
Brewing heavy weather.

Bring a song for the evening
Clean brass to flash the dawn
across these acres glistening
like dew on a carpet lawn
In these dark towns folk lie sleeping
as the heavy horses thunder by
to wake the dying city
with the living horseman’s cry
At once the old hands quicken —
bring pick and wisp and curry comb —
thrill to the sound of all
the heavy horses coming home.

‘The Flute Is A Heavy Metal Instrument’

What can you say about a group of guys who made a video like that in 1978? What can you say about a bunch of bearded heads who were then and are still playing shows to sold out crowds worldwide? What can you say about a group of guys who beat out Metallica in 1987, winning a grammy for ‘Best Hard Rock/Metal Performance’? (Crest of a Knave, in case you’re wondering.)

And what can you say about Ian Anderson, the consummate frontman performer for the band? How can you expect anyone to believe that he taught himself to play that flute, along with nearly every other instrument ever to appear on a Tull album? Would it help to know that he was awarded an honorary Doctorate of Literature in 2006?

I have listened to these guys for roughly the last 40 years, and they have been one of my favorite bands. Even the releases I didn’t like, I still knew they were good. For instance, ‘Passion Play’ was a smashing multi-decade success, but I just don’t like most of it. In contrast, an instant personal favorite – ‘Thick As A Brick’ – took years to catch on, but you’re lucky to ever hear more than the first 12 minutes played on the air.

Personal Note

Some of you already know and some of you don’t, so here it is: I haven’t been feeling too well lately and am currently in the process of making some major changes to my lifestyle. I’m sorta flying by the seat of my pants here, and am in no way certain of the outcome of all these attempted changes.

The changes I am making are difficult, including things like not smoking, trying to exercise, monitoring my diet and body like a hawk, and deciding this past week that I will most likely need to give up Computergeek Services, the business I have grown and loved these past 10 years.

My customers, those loyal folks who have kept me going, are like family to me. I promise them that they will not be simply cast away like a used-up dishrag. They’ve become accustomed to personal service at a more than reasonable price, and I am doing everything I can to ensure that will continue.

My readers here are a constant source of amazement and exhilaration to me. As long as I am able, I will continue to write and share with you just as I have done here since 2004. If I lose the rights to this website (which is to say if I sell CGS), I will simply transfer the feeds to my personal domain – jonknight.us – and we’ll just carry on from there.

I am Jon, and I plan to stay that way.

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Masked Avengers vs Sarah Palin

Half-Baked Alaskan

There’s not much I can add to this. The Youtube player will play the audio. Follow along with the transcript provided.

Heh heh heh… enjoy:

From ABC News Blog:

Following is the transcript of the relevant part with a few notes.

GOV. SARAH PALIN: This is Sarah.

MASKED AVENGERS: Ah, yeah, Gov. Palin.

GOV. PALIN: Helloooo!

MASKED AVENGERS: Just hold on for President Sarkozy, one moment.

GOV. PALIN: Oh, it’s not him yet, they’re saying. I always do that!

MASKED AVENGERS: Yes, hello, Gov. Palin…

GOV. PALIN: Hello, this is Sarah, how are you?

MASKED AVENGERS: Fine, and you? This is Nicolas Sarkozy speaking, how are you?

[Note: Sarkozy does not speak fluent English.]

GOV. PALIN: Oh, so good, it’s so good to hear you. Thank you for calling us.

MASKED AVENGERS: Oh, it’s a pleasure.

GOV. PALIN: Thank you sir, we have such great respect for you, John McCain and I. We love you and thank you for taking a few minutes to talk to me.

MASKED AVENGERS: I follow your campaigns closely with my special American adviser Johnny Hallyday, you know?

[Note: Hallyday is a French singer and actor.]

GOV. PALIN: Yes, good.

MASKED AVENGERS: Excellent. Are you confident?

GOV. PALIN: Very confident and we’re thankful that polls are showing that the race is tightening and —

MASKED AVENGERS: Well I know very well that the campaign can be exhausting. How do you feel right now, my dear?

GOV. PALIN: I feel so good. I feel like we’re in a marathon and at the very end of the marathon you get your second wind and you plow to the finish.

MASKED AVENGERS: You see, I got elected in France because I’m real and you seem to be someone who’s real, as well.

GOV. PALIN: Yes, yeah. Nicolas, we so appreciate this opportunity.

MASKED AVENGERS: You know I see you as a president one day, you too.

GOV. PALIN: (laughing) Maybe in eight years.

MASKED AVENGERS: Well, I hope for you. You know, we have a lot in common because personally one of my favorite activities is to hunt, too.

GOV. PALIN: Oh, very good. We should go hunting together.

MASKED AVENGERS: Exactly, we could go try hunting by helicopter like you did. I never did that. Like we say in French, on pourrait tuer des bebe phoques, aussi.

[Translation: We could also kill some baby seals.]

GOV. PALIN: Well, I think we could have a lot of fun together as we’re getting work done. We can kill two birds with one stone that way.

MASKED AVENGERS: I just love killing those animals. Mmm, mmm, take away life, that is so fun. I’d really love to go, as long as we don’t bring along Vice-President Cheney. (Laughs.)

GOV. PALIN: No, I’ll be a careful shot, yes.

MASKED AVENGERS: Yes, you know we have a lot in common also, because except from my house I can see Belgium. That’s kind of less interesting than you.

GOV. PALIN: Well, see, we’re right next door to different countries that we all need to be working with, yes.

MASKED AVENGERS: Some people said in the last days and I thought that was mean that you weren’t experienced enough in foreign relations and you know that’s completely false. That’s the thing that I said to my great friend, the prime minister of Canada Stef Carse.

[Note: That is not the name of the prime minister of Canada. The prime minster of Canada, since January 2006, is Stephen Harper. THIS is Stef Carse.]

GOV. PALIN: Well, he’s doin’ fine, too, and yeah, when you come into a position underestimated it gives you an opportunity to prove the pundits and the critics wrong. You work that much harder —

MASKED AVENGERS: I was wondering because you are so next to him, one of my good friends, the prime minister of Quebec, Mr. Richard Z. Sirois, have you met him recently? Did he come to one of your rallies?

[Note: There is no prime minister of Quebec, though there is a premier. His name is Jean Charest. Sirois is a Canadian humorist.]

GOV. PALIN: I haven’t seen him at one of the rallies but it’s been great working with the Canadian officials. I know as governor we have a great co-operative effort there as we work on all of our resource development projects. You know, I look forward to working with you and getting to meet you personally and your beautiful wife. Oh my goodness, you’ve added a lot of energy to your country with um, with that beautiful family of yours.

MASKED AVENGERS: Thank you very much. You know my wife Carla would love to meet you, you know, even though you know she was a bit jealous that I was supposed to speak to you today. (Laughs.)

GOV. PALIN: Well, give her a big hug for me.

MASKED AVENGERS: You know my wife is a popular singer and a former top model and she’s so hot in bed. She even wrote a song for you.

GOV. PALIN: Oh my goodness, I didn’t know that.

MASKED AVENGERS: Yes, in French it’s called de rouge a levre sur un cochon, or if you prefer in English, Joe the Plumber…(singing) it’s his life, Joe the Plumber.

[Translation: Lipstick for a pig.]

GOV. PALIN: Maybe she understands some of the unfair criticism but I bet you she is such a hard worker, too, and she realizes you just plow through that criticism.

MASKED AVENGERS: I just want to be sure. That phenomenon Joe the Plumber. That’s not your husband, right?

GOV. PALIN: That’s not my husband but he’s a normal American who just works hard and doesn’t want government to take his money.

MASKED AVENGERS: Yes, yes, I understand we have the equivalent of the Joe the Plumber in France. It’s called Marcel, the guy with bread under his armpit, oui.

GOV. PALIN: Right, that’s what it’s all about, the middle class and government needing to work for them. You’re a very good example for us here.

MASKED AVENGERS: I see a bit about NBC, even Fox News wasn’t an ally, an ally, sorry as much as usual.

GOV. PALIN: Yeah, that’s what we’re up against.

MASKED AVENGERS: Gov. Palin, I love the documentary they made on your life. You know Hustler’s Nailin’ Paylin?

[Note: Nailin’ Paylin is a pornographic movie.]

GOV. PALIN: Ohh, good, thank you, yes.

MASKED AVENGERS: That was really edgy.

GOV. PALIN: Well, good.

MASKED AVENGERS: I really loved you and I must say something also, so governor, you’ve been pranked by the Masked Avengers. We are two comedians from Montreal.

GOV. PALIN: Ohhh, have we been pranked? And what radio station is this?

MASKED AVENGERS: This is for CKOI in Montreal.

GOV. PALIN: In Montreal? Tell me the radio station call letters.

MASKED AVENGERS: CK…hello?…

And then she hands the phone to an aid to hang up on the Masked Avengers.

.
.
.

I am Jon, a Republican voting AGAINST Palin.

It’s A Series Of (You) Tubes

Tubes (Talk To Ya Later)

Shooting Star (Last Chance)

Crack The Sky (Surf City)

Crack The Sky (From The Greenhouse)

Rush (Mission)

Rush (Marathon)

Rush (Time Stand Still)

.

.

.

I am Jon, a spirit with a vision.

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Quantum Mechanics for Dummies

Electrons Are Weird

Great video, takes about 10 minutes to watch, includes actual photographs, taken through an electron microscope, at a resolution of one atom. If you’re short on time, start the video around 7:30.

But you really ought to take ten and watch the whole thing. This is some truly amazing stuff.


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.

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I am Jon, and I’m thinking about waves.

Permission: Denied! – Audible.com Review

:en:Seth GodinPERMISSION: DENIED!
Image via Wikipedia
Rant

So I find out I can download Seth Godin’s new book, in audio format, for free. I go there and it’s actually Audible.com, so I fill out their required info, and get to the download page.

It’s audio. I’m expecting something I can use, such as an mp3 file. But no….

They want to download their ‘management software’. They have a very misleading box where you click on how you plan to listen to the file. Regardless of what you click, you always get taken… to their ‘you gotta download our software management’ page.

So I figure, ‘These guys just want access to my pc.’ And I decide that I don’t want them in my house, so I go looking through the account settings for a ‘cancel my account’ link. Can’t find one, so after about 20 minutes of looking around I go to the ‘HELP’ link and type in the following:

I want my account deleted. I feel that I was misled about your company and I want all my account info deleted.
My desire for this is only ENHANCED by the lack of any readily available info on how to do this.
I WILL NOT download your audio player when simple mp3 should work JUST FINE.
I feel like you have totally misrepresented yourself to me and as a result of being sent here by an indirect method from Seth Godin, whom I have in the past respected, I will now stop paying attention to him as well.
Permission based indeed. All you guys seem to want is your software on my pc.
Jon Knight

When I hit the submit button, this is what I get:

Need to Cancel Your Audible Membership?

We’re sorry for the inconvenience, but the email option is no longer available.

We want to provide you with the best possible customer experience, even if you decide to cancel your membership.

You may either contact us via our toll-free number or cancel your membership online at Make Changes To My Membership ***.

Please contact us at: 888-283-5051
Hours:
Monday-Friday 9AM-10PM EST
Saturday 10AM-7PM EST

The toll-free number would allow us to:

– Address any technical or usability issues that might be hindering your use of Audible
– Make sure you know about all of the entitlements of Audible
– Get your feedback, so that we can continuously improve the service

We appreciate your business and value you as a customer!

The Audible Team

I clicked the link there, which is supposed to allow me to do this online and I get errors. Nice work…

Just like the idiots at Alltel, these bozos give you an option in a drop down menu and then tell you they don’t support that. Following is my interpretation of their sorry(ass) page:

So you want to cancel your membership, huh? Too damned bad, we don’t let you do that.If you really want to cancel your membership you’re gonna have to take time out of your already overbooked life and call us first, because we’re gonna do and say everything possible to make you stay with us. We’re giving you a link to click here which will not work, regardless of how many times you try, so you may as well just call us so we can give you all the (HARD SELL) reasons why you need to stay with such a shiftless bunch of folks like us.
We appreciate your business, and we’re not letting go of you without a fight.

I am Jon, and this is the kind of schlock that should be wiped from the web.
/rant

Image 2

PERMISSION: DENIED

Paul McCartney Says ‘Boycott MacDonalds’

The Real Big Macca

Paul McCartney has been a vegetarian for the past 30 years. According to Paul, he became a vegetartian one day while he was fishing:

‘Many years ago I was fishing, and as I was reeling in the poor fish, I realised, “I am killing him – all for the passing pleasure it brings me.” And something inside me clicked. I realised as I watched him fight for breath, that his life was as important to him as mine is to me.’

Some animal rights groups like to claim he decided to quit meat while watching lambs play, but I can’t find Paul saying that anywhere.

Regardless of how and why he made the choice, Sir Paul is pissed. The MacDonald’s restaurants in Liverpool are displaying his photo along with the other Beatles in their restaurants. According to The Telegraph:

The singer, who has been a vocal advocate of vegetarianism for 30 years was said to be furious after discovering pictures of the Beatles had been placed prominently in a restaurant in his home town.

His image appeared alongside former band mates John Lennon, Ringo Starr and George Harrison.

Geoff Baker, a spokesman for Sir Paul said: “What sort of morons do McDonald’s think Beatles’ fans are.

“It’s ridiculous and insulting to use images to peddle hamburgers. Fans should boycott Mcdonald’s, and not just in Liverpool.”

Sir Paul is a staunch supporter of animal rights, president of the Vegetarian Society of Great Britain and an ambassador for People for the Ethical treatment of Animals (PETA). His late wife Linda had her own range of vegetarian foods.

[…]

“We hope anyone who sees his picture on the wall will be reminded that he’s a vegetarian and skip the Big Mac for a veggie burger.”

A McDonald’s spokeswoman said the pictures were to “acknowledge the outstanding contribution the Beatles made to both local and global culture.”

Live And Let Die

Of course, this is just a convenient excuse to include this video of one of my favorite songs from the early 70s. Enjoy…


Live And Let Die

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I am Jon, and I’ve been boycotting MacDonalds for about as long as Paul has been a vegetarian.

She Kissed Me So Lightly

In 1986 I had an accident which caused some memory loss. This is a short slice of the day I woke up.

Once Upon A Time

I woke in a room, alone in a bed. Two little toddler boys stood there, striped shirts stretched tight across fat little bellies. They seemed familiar, but in the dim light I couldn’t quite make out their faces. I tried to speak.

I was going to say something like ‘Hello little fellas’, but as I started to speak, they turned like little fish and ran out of the room. Closing my eyes, I tried to ignore the relentless machine in my head, a throbbing, grinding thing that was not really noise, not really even real, but still the most insistently painful thing in the world.

I opened my eyes and tried to remember where I was. Looking around, nothing was familiar. I wondered who the boys were. My memory was a jumbled bunch of puzzle pieces, some face up and some face down. I knew something must have happened, and since I couldn’t remember what that was I knew it must have been bad.

The beat of feet down a hallway announced the return of the little boys. Right behind them was a woman with long hair and striking, exotic features. She called me ‘Jon’. She said it like she knew me, like she’d said it before.

She sat on the bed, placed the back of her fingers on my forehead, then with two fingers pressing my throat, she checked my pulse. Satisfied, she slid her fingers along my hairline the way your mother does when you’re all a mess. Leaning in close, she whispered

I love you.

And she kissed me so lightly you might never have known about it, if I didn’t tell you here.

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I am Jon, and the gentle memories move me.

Image 9

Olympic Grade Fireworks

Found this photo over at the New York Times. What a sight…

It’s a shame that NBC decided to delay the broadcasts by half a day. This picture was taken this morning. Check out some more really great pictures over at the NYT. Thanks to Mashable for pointing me there.

As usual, you know who I am.
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Image 18

Doobie Sunday

As In, Brothers

The very first record I ever bought was The Doobie Brothers – The Captain And Me. I bought two lp’s that day (the other was Yes – Close To The Edge) and I still own them today, more than 30 years later. Check my last.fm profile and you’ll see that I still listen to them both.

Truthfully, I listen to the mp3’s of the tracks from those albums, and not the albums themselves. I’m not dropping a needle on those babies again ’til my 50th birthday. I’m thinking of throwing a vinyl-only party. We’ll see…

I’ve written and re-written paragraphs about these guys, and finally just deleted them all. For those of you old enough to know who they are, you know there’s nothing I can add to them with my words. For those of you too young to know who they are, just listen to the 1st track below and you’ll get it. It’s clear as… well, you get the picture.

These guys are still doing shows to sold out crowds in 2008. Some of the video below is very recent. And yes, they are still all about the music.

For your Sunday enjoyment, I present Doobie Sunday @ Wordout.


Clear As The Driven Snow

Playin’ easy somewhere, shade across my mind
Thoughts that pass I cannot catch, I reach for you and find
That I have learned how not to get burned now
Wind in the tree blows, even the sea knows
That I have learned how, think I can see now
Lookin’ through dreams is not what it seems

They handed me the bottle and said drink it ’til it’s gone
But now that it’s half empty I’m not sure I can go on
Thought I had learned how not to get burned now
Wind in the tree blows, even the sea knows
That I have learned how, think I can see now
Lookin’ through dreams…

I keep rollin’, I keep rollin’
I keep rollin’ and I can’t stop
Rollin’ and I can’t stop
It is driving me out of my mind
To the truck stop, to the plane hop
To the boat dock and I’m so close
Boat dock and I’m so close
Give me a little more time

Spin me around, turn my heart down
Take me down slow, don’t let me go
Spin me around, turn my love down
Take me down slow, don’t let me go
Gonna quit you, gonna quit you
Gonna quit you, pretty mama
Quit you, hey mama
You know that I ain’t got time
Get behind me, get behind me
Get behind me, now bad times
Oh, bad times
There’s nothin’ in there you can hide
Spin me around, turn my love down
Take me down slow, don’t let me go
Spin me around, turn my love down
Take me down slow, don’t let…

Without You

I get a feelin, lost without you baby
Livin alone is drivin me crazy
Dont you know
I got nowhere to go
You should be the one thats hurtin
You got everything you need

Back in the days when love was so easy
I was fancy free and laughin with no reason
Things have changed
Your touch has grown strange
I cant help myself
I know that you have left me dyin here

Baby, baby
I cant live without you
Baby, baby
I cant live without you no more
Baby, baby
I cant live without you
I feel you know it, huh

Oh, baby, now Im lost without my baby
Oh, baby, baby, babe, dont you hear right now

Another Park, Another Sunday

I’m sittin’ in my room, starin’ out the window
And wonderin’ where you’ve gone
Thinking back on the happy hours just before the dawn
Outside the wind is blowin’
It seems to call your name again
Why have you gone

City streets and lonely highways
I travel now
My car is empty and the radio just seems to bring me down
I’m just tryin’ to find me A pretty smile that I can get into
It’s true, I’m lost without you

Another lonely park, another Sunday
Why is it life turns out that way
Just when you think you got a good thing
It seems to slip away

It’s warm outside, no clouds are in the sky
But I need myself a place to go and hide
I keep to myself
I don’t want nobody else To see me cryin’
all those tears in my eyes

Another park, another Sunday
Why is it life turns out that way
Just when you think you got a good thing
It seems to slip away
Another park, another Sunday
It’s dark and empty thanks to you
I got to get myself together
But it’s hard to do

What A Fool Believes

He came from somewhere back in her long ago
The sentimental fool dont see
Tryin hard to recreate
What had yet to be created once in her life

She musters a smile For his nostalgic tale
Never coming near what he wanted to say
Only to realize It never really was

She had a place in his life
He never made her think twice
As he rises to her apology
Anybody else would surely know
Hes watching her go

But what a fool believes he sees
No wise man has the power to reason away
What seems to be Is always better than nothing
And nothing at all keeps sending him…

Somewhere back in her long ago
Where he can still believe theres a place in her life
Someday, somewhere, she will return

She had a place in his life
He never made her think twice
As he rises to her apology
Anybody else would surely know
Hes watching her go

But what a fool believes he sees
No wise man has the power to reason away
What seems to be Is always better than nothing
Theres nothing at all But what a fool believes he sees…

Minute By Minute

Hey, don’t worry, Ive been lied to
Ive been here many times before
Girl, don’t you worry, I know where I stand
I don’t need this love, I don’t need your hand
I know I could turn, blink, and you’d be gone
Then I must be prepared any time to carry on

But minute by minute by minute by minute
I keep holding on
Oh, minute by minute by minute by minute
I keep holding on

You will stay just to watch me, darlin
Wilt away on lies from you
Cant stop the habit of livin on the run
I take it all for granted like you’re the only one
Livin on my own
Sometimes that sounds nice
You think Im your fool
You may just be right

cause minute by minute by minute by minute
I keep holding on
Oh, minute by minute by minute by minute
I keep holding on

Call my name and I’ll be gone
You’ll reach out and I wont be there
Just my luck you’ll realize
You should spend your life with someone
You could spend your life with someone

Minute by minute by minute by minute
I’ll be holding on
Oh, minute by minute by minute by minute
I’ll be holding on…

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I am Jon, and remember: It’s toke-PASS, Bogart.

Facebook News Flash – Laugh A Little

Thanks to Paul over at Mashable for pointing me to this, so I could share it with you. The video is produced by TrainOfThought, a Seattle based comedy group that I have, in one day, come to love.

This copy is hosted over at Current.com. If you like it, head on over there and check out the dozens more they have listed on their site.

Sit back and prepare to giggle…

I am Jon. Now, where’s that random hot chick?