Category: Fun Stuff

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Masked Avengers vs Sarah Palin

Half-Baked Alaskan

There’s not much I can add to this. The Youtube player will play the audio. Follow along with the transcript provided.

Heh heh heh… enjoy:

From ABC News Blog:

Following is the transcript of the relevant part with a few notes.

GOV. SARAH PALIN: This is Sarah.

MASKED AVENGERS: Ah, yeah, Gov. Palin.

GOV. PALIN: Helloooo!

MASKED AVENGERS: Just hold on for President Sarkozy, one moment.

GOV. PALIN: Oh, it’s not him yet, they’re saying. I always do that!

MASKED AVENGERS: Yes, hello, Gov. Palin…

GOV. PALIN: Hello, this is Sarah, how are you?

MASKED AVENGERS: Fine, and you? This is Nicolas Sarkozy speaking, how are you?

[Note: Sarkozy does not speak fluent English.]

GOV. PALIN: Oh, so good, it’s so good to hear you. Thank you for calling us.

MASKED AVENGERS: Oh, it’s a pleasure.

GOV. PALIN: Thank you sir, we have such great respect for you, John McCain and I. We love you and thank you for taking a few minutes to talk to me.

MASKED AVENGERS: I follow your campaigns closely with my special American adviser Johnny Hallyday, you know?

[Note: Hallyday is a French singer and actor.]

GOV. PALIN: Yes, good.

MASKED AVENGERS: Excellent. Are you confident?

GOV. PALIN: Very confident and we’re thankful that polls are showing that the race is tightening and —

MASKED AVENGERS: Well I know very well that the campaign can be exhausting. How do you feel right now, my dear?

GOV. PALIN: I feel so good. I feel like we’re in a marathon and at the very end of the marathon you get your second wind and you plow to the finish.

MASKED AVENGERS: You see, I got elected in France because I’m real and you seem to be someone who’s real, as well.

GOV. PALIN: Yes, yeah. Nicolas, we so appreciate this opportunity.

MASKED AVENGERS: You know I see you as a president one day, you too.

GOV. PALIN: (laughing) Maybe in eight years.

MASKED AVENGERS: Well, I hope for you. You know, we have a lot in common because personally one of my favorite activities is to hunt, too.

GOV. PALIN: Oh, very good. We should go hunting together.

MASKED AVENGERS: Exactly, we could go try hunting by helicopter like you did. I never did that. Like we say in French, on pourrait tuer des bebe phoques, aussi.

[Translation: We could also kill some baby seals.]

GOV. PALIN: Well, I think we could have a lot of fun together as we’re getting work done. We can kill two birds with one stone that way.

MASKED AVENGERS: I just love killing those animals. Mmm, mmm, take away life, that is so fun. I’d really love to go, as long as we don’t bring along Vice-President Cheney. (Laughs.)

GOV. PALIN: No, I’ll be a careful shot, yes.

MASKED AVENGERS: Yes, you know we have a lot in common also, because except from my house I can see Belgium. That’s kind of less interesting than you.

GOV. PALIN: Well, see, we’re right next door to different countries that we all need to be working with, yes.

MASKED AVENGERS: Some people said in the last days and I thought that was mean that you weren’t experienced enough in foreign relations and you know that’s completely false. That’s the thing that I said to my great friend, the prime minister of Canada Stef Carse.

[Note: That is not the name of the prime minister of Canada. The prime minster of Canada, since January 2006, is Stephen Harper. THIS is Stef Carse.]

GOV. PALIN: Well, he’s doin’ fine, too, and yeah, when you come into a position underestimated it gives you an opportunity to prove the pundits and the critics wrong. You work that much harder —

MASKED AVENGERS: I was wondering because you are so next to him, one of my good friends, the prime minister of Quebec, Mr. Richard Z. Sirois, have you met him recently? Did he come to one of your rallies?

[Note: There is no prime minister of Quebec, though there is a premier. His name is Jean Charest. Sirois is a Canadian humorist.]

GOV. PALIN: I haven’t seen him at one of the rallies but it’s been great working with the Canadian officials. I know as governor we have a great co-operative effort there as we work on all of our resource development projects. You know, I look forward to working with you and getting to meet you personally and your beautiful wife. Oh my goodness, you’ve added a lot of energy to your country with um, with that beautiful family of yours.

MASKED AVENGERS: Thank you very much. You know my wife Carla would love to meet you, you know, even though you know she was a bit jealous that I was supposed to speak to you today. (Laughs.)

GOV. PALIN: Well, give her a big hug for me.

MASKED AVENGERS: You know my wife is a popular singer and a former top model and she’s so hot in bed. She even wrote a song for you.

GOV. PALIN: Oh my goodness, I didn’t know that.

MASKED AVENGERS: Yes, in French it’s called de rouge a levre sur un cochon, or if you prefer in English, Joe the Plumber…(singing) it’s his life, Joe the Plumber.

[Translation: Lipstick for a pig.]

GOV. PALIN: Maybe she understands some of the unfair criticism but I bet you she is such a hard worker, too, and she realizes you just plow through that criticism.

MASKED AVENGERS: I just want to be sure. That phenomenon Joe the Plumber. That’s not your husband, right?

GOV. PALIN: That’s not my husband but he’s a normal American who just works hard and doesn’t want government to take his money.

MASKED AVENGERS: Yes, yes, I understand we have the equivalent of the Joe the Plumber in France. It’s called Marcel, the guy with bread under his armpit, oui.

GOV. PALIN: Right, that’s what it’s all about, the middle class and government needing to work for them. You’re a very good example for us here.

MASKED AVENGERS: I see a bit about NBC, even Fox News wasn’t an ally, an ally, sorry as much as usual.

GOV. PALIN: Yeah, that’s what we’re up against.

MASKED AVENGERS: Gov. Palin, I love the documentary they made on your life. You know Hustler’s Nailin’ Paylin?

[Note: Nailin’ Paylin is a pornographic movie.]

GOV. PALIN: Ohh, good, thank you, yes.

MASKED AVENGERS: That was really edgy.

GOV. PALIN: Well, good.

MASKED AVENGERS: I really loved you and I must say something also, so governor, you’ve been pranked by the Masked Avengers. We are two comedians from Montreal.

GOV. PALIN: Ohhh, have we been pranked? And what radio station is this?

MASKED AVENGERS: This is for CKOI in Montreal.

GOV. PALIN: In Montreal? Tell me the radio station call letters.

MASKED AVENGERS: CK…hello?…

And then she hands the phone to an aid to hang up on the Masked Avengers.

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I am Jon, a Republican voting AGAINST Palin.

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Quantum Mechanics for Dummies

Electrons Are Weird

Great video, takes about 10 minutes to watch, includes actual photographs, taken through an electron microscope, at a resolution of one atom. If you’re short on time, start the video around 7:30.

But you really ought to take ten and watch the whole thing. This is some truly amazing stuff.


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I am Jon, and I’m thinking about waves.

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Boybama – Battleground For Your Heart

Goin’ Out To All The White Women

Especially those living in Ohio, Michigan, New Hampshire, New Mexico, Virginia, and Nevada…

(disclaimer: I’m a ‘white’ man, so I can say that, right? ;^)

Thanks to Kara at AllThingsDigital for pointing us to this video. As she says, it’s strangely addictive.

Check it out:



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I am Jon… hey! Where’d everybody go?

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Sarah Palin On SNL

Why Sarah Palin Scares MeImage by Jon Person via FlickrLive From New York, Itssss

Saturday night, with guest star Sarah Palin and host Josh Brodin, star of the just released movie, “W“. The AP reports:

…barely two weeks before the election, suddenly everybody’s a comedian – from Republican vice presidential candidate Palin to the guys at the top of the bill: John McCain and Barack Obama, laughing it up this week at a big political dinner in New York.

Palin already has been the hit of the “SNL” season, though she wasn’t on the scene. She was the subject of a parody featuring lookalike actress Tina Fey. Whether Palin and Fey will appear together Saturday has not been announced.

Palin suggests her fate is in the hands of the show’s writers. “I haven’t seen a script, not at all. They haven’t even hinted about what that script is going to say,” she told radio talk-show host Neal Boortz on Friday.

“But you know, I just want to be there to show Americans that we will rise above the political shots that we take because we’re in this serious business for serious challenges that are facing the good American people right now.”

Hmm. Presumably the show’s writers have some slightly punchier lines in mind.

Fey’s appearances as Palin have drawn huge audiences to the longtime skit show and sealed its reputation as TV’s hottest vehicle for political satire. Obama has appeared briefly on the show since becoming a candidate, and McCain once hosted a show. One episode during the primaries suggested the media were favoring Obama over Hillary Rodham Clinton – and a lot of people thought coverage for the next few weeks was affected.

Finally. We get to laugh at Sarah Palin… again.

I am Jon, and you’re not.

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The Ballad Of The Bailout Of 2008

LYRICS:
I used to think that Freddie Mac was a pimp,
but now my mutual fund is the one walking with a limp

And Fannie Mae, you almost failed me, boo
–But the faithful feds, they bailed you.

Poor Lehman Brothers….yall got the shaft (shaft!)
The government said, good luck with that (shaft!)

And AIG, old Uncle Sam he loaned you
85 Billion, but now he owns you.

Some cry out, Weve become a socialist state!
While others say, We need to regulate.
Should I vote McCain or pull the lever for O-bama?
Im thinkin either way, Ill be movin back in with momma.
(but the cookins good—and I think she’ll drive me to work)

You see, I dont have much job security
Im an internet comedian…Im not sure thats even technically a job. I dont think it is.
I cant put my finger on it; but you know things have gone wrong
when I cant even afford to finish this…

FREE mp3:
http://rhettandlink.com/blog/2008/09/…

Thanks to MicroBilt!! http://www.microbilt.com

I am Jon, and at least I can afford to finish this sentence.

Stretching

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Hedge Fund of the People

StrategeryCapital Management LLC

About Strategery

Strategery is a unique hedge fund.

It is the largest in the world, with expected initial capital of $700 billion. It has a free and unlimited credit line should it need more. It has no fixed mandate, though it is expected to initially focus on mortgage-backed securities. And it is the only fund backed by the full faith and credit of the U.S. Government.

Strategery is a way for you to be more patriotic. Supporting this fund is an American duty. Many people have already taken to wearing a green, red, and blue ribbon to symbolize and broadcast their support for this newest American institution.

Click the link and then click every link you find at StrategeryCapital, especially the one at the bottom of the page. Great for an uncontrollable giggle. I think we need one right about now.

I am Jon. Don’t forget to laugh.

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Google Street View Taken To The Extreme

Zoom Out, Zoom Out, It’s Gone

Thanks to GeeksAreSexy for pointing me to GoogleStreetViewSightings. The guys there have put together some rather interesting and sometimes funny pictures and videos. Here’s one I really liked, and decided to include it in this weeks Sunday Series…

Head on over there and check out more stuff that will make you laugh… or at least go ‘hmmm’.

I am Jon, reminding you: the only place you can hide is

EdgeOn

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The Obama Girl + Ralph Nader Show

Starring Obama Girl and 2008 Independent Presidential candidate Ralph Nader, with a special appearance from Governor Jesse Ventura. Enjoy…

Mr. Nader should be included, don’t you think?

I am Jon, and I’d like to hear what he has to say at the debates…if they aren’t canceled.

Thanks to Kara at Boomtown…

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Wow. Salt Water Burns.

Save Our Coastal Cities! Burn The Ocean!

I wouldn’t have believed this if I didn’t see it. Some friends and I were discussing water powered cars just yesterday. Though this isn’t about water powered cars, it is about water power.

Apparently, subjecting salt water to some particular radio waves makes it burn. Watch:



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I am Jon, and I am thinking: As the oceans rise, will we just burn them in our cars to save our coastal cities?

thx to JackAbraham for the reminder.

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Gina Gershon, Sarah Palin And Barracuda

Alaska Governor Sarah PalinImage via Wikipedia ‘Jocularity, Jocularity, Jocularity’

I am not a McCain/Palin supporter. So don’t misunderstand me when I say that a particularly sardonic part of me hopes we have Palin to make fun of for awhile. Maybe if we weren’t in the middle of a climate crisis, and an energy crisis, and a financial crisis (have I missed any here?)…

Anyway, you get my point. If we didn’t seriously need real leaders right now, it would be nice to have old Johnny McCain and sexy Sarah Palin around. Stewart and Colbert would reach new heights of incongruent absurdity and caustic remark.

Common Sense

Common sense tells us that there’s no way an old guy who can’t even deliver simple sentences without saying something wrong and a sexy but essentially empty-brained bimbo from Nowhere, Alaska could ever be elected president. (Then again, the last 2 elections have ended with some surprises.)

Regardless, Gina Gershon isn’t waiting (probably a smart move). Below is a video short I found over at FunnyOrDie.com, a minute and a half of Gina doing Sarah, and pulling it off beautifully. Enjoy…


See more Gina Gershon videos at Funny or Die

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I <3 Heart

If you thought THAT was funny, check out the post over at Techdirt and be sure to read through the comments. The article is about the McCain campaign’s continued use of the song “Barracuda” by Heart. The band has requested that the song not be used because they don’t agree with or support the McCain/Palin ticket. The Republicans have ignored the request, arguing that they’ve paid for the use of the song, and they will continue to use it.

In the comments, an alternate set of lyrics is proposed, partially quoted below:

Sarrahcuda

So is Palin the end –
She’s failing again today
I had to turn my vote away
Smiled like the sun –
Wishes for real
And wails – it never fails!

She’s lying so low in the weeds
I bet she’s gonna ambush me
She’d have me down down down down on my knees
Now wouldn’t she, Sarrahcuda?

Back over time we were all
Living free
You met the people and me
No right no wrong, selling a psalm-
A name, whisper game.

If the real thing doesn’t do the trick
She’d better make up something quick
She’s gonna turn turn turn turn it to the stick
Ooooooh, Sarrahcuda?

Sell me sell you the party said
Dive down deep down to give em lead!
You…I think you got the blues too.

All that night and all the next
Scam without looking back
Made for the neo-con pools – silly fools!

If the real thing doesn’t do the trick
She’d better make up something quick
She’s gonna cry about a pig in lipstick
Ooooooohhhh, Sarrah Sarrahcuda.
Ohhhhhhhhhhhh.


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The Twist

And finally, the words of another commenter in the previously mentioned post, who notes a certain irony in the whole fiasco:

Taking the nickname given to you by students who weren’t exactly fans of you, and then taking a song by a band who actively and publicly dislike you to promote that nickname, whilst at the same time giving funds directly to Obama’s campaign (the money the band get from their use of the song, they give to Obama’s campaign)…

That’s pretty silly.

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I’m Jon. Silly, indeed.

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2 Ten Minute Links

ein CRAY-1Image via Wikipedia

Here’s a couple of great places to spend 10 minutes when you’re looking for something new on the net. Science, history and just plain fun are only a click away.

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A Little History, Loads Of Fun

I’ve been spending a little time over at the National Science Foundation’s website, and I found a interactive piece called ‘NSF and the Birth of the Internet’. With images and some well-written text, it allows you to trace the history of of what we now call the web, from the initial questions about connecting two computers together, to researching the next generation of the internet. Definitely worth taking a few minutes to check out.

I was especially interested in the second photo in the 70s section. That’s a Cray 1 supercomputer. (That’s it over on the right.) At the time it was about the fastest thing on the planet. Looking at it’s specs shows that most of us have more power than this on our desktops, and some of us have more on our phones. I liked it because it had a built-in couch. From their website:

The first Cray-1™ system was installed at Los Alamos National Laboratory in 1976 for $8.8 million. It boasted a world-record speed of 160 million floating-point operations per second (160 megaflops) and an 8 megabyte (1 million word) main memory. The Cray-1’s architecture reflected its designer’s penchant for bridging technical hurdles with revolutionary ideas. In order to increase the speed of this system, the Cray-1 had a unique “C” shape which enabled integrated circuits to be closer together. No wire in the system was more than four feet long. To handle the intense heat generated by the computer, Cray developed an innovative refrigeration system using Freon.

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Playcrafter

Another cool site I found (through GigaOm) is Playcrafter, where you can build your own games…

I started to write a short thing about how to use their site, but they’ve already done a much better job by creating this really short (less than 2 mins) video.


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– Jon, hoping you like the links.

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Without Her

…Rise To Face Another Day…

In keeping with the general tone this week, I am pleased to present and hope you enjoy just over 2 minutes of Harry Nilsson. This in no way represents the way I feel about Democratic chances at the polls this November.




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I am Jon, spending the night in a chair…

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Think Wind Power

Windspire

Think personal electricity generation is just a dream? Think you’ll always be at the mercy of the big utility companies? Think again.

As the video below shows, personal electricity generation is just around the corner. The model shown here is capable of producing enough electricity to power up to 40% of your home. For someone like me, who uses about half the average in the US, that translates to nearly 100%. Of course, when I move to the electric car that will all change.




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For more information on the Windspire, head on over to Mariah Power and check it out.

I am Jon, and I want one.

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(edit: find another well-written piece about the Windspire at EcoGeek.)
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Byrne And Eno Stream Latest Album

Pioneer Rockstars

You’ll remember these guys from their work with Talking Heads and Roxy Music. Ground-breaking stuff back then. Much of the last 2 decades of music has been influenced by these guys. From today’s vantage point, they could be called rockstar pioneers.

Well, they’re at it again, joining with the likes of Trent Reznor, their latest album Everything That Happens Will Happen Today, was released online in a fully functional, completely grabbable streaming player. You’ll see it down below. Go ahead and check it out. It’s chock full of complete songs from the new album. Just hit the play button…


If you like this, you can grab it and take it with you, or you could go over to their site and check out the other options they give you. One of the songs can be downloaded for free, and there are several options on buying DRM-free tracks for download. If you’re still into physical purchases, you can order the CD or a deluxe package. Prices range from free to about 70 bucks.

I am Jon, just letting the days go by.

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The Perseids or Whatever Happened to Swift-Tuttle?

This picture is of the Alpha-Monocerotid meteo...Image via WikipediaGood Reason To Wake Early

The Perseid meteor shower has been going on for nearly a month. As Earth passes through the remnants of the comet Swift-Tuttle’s tail the number of visible meteors increases until tomorrow morning, when the number should peak at around 60 per hour early Tuesday morning. For the northern hemisphere, this is about the best natural light show of the year.

The full moon should set around 1:30 am in most parts of the US, so the best viewing should be between then and the ‘official’ peak, expected around 7am on the east coast. Binoculars are optional, but unnecessary. Warm clothing might be appreciated, as we’re going through this unnatural cold-spell this week.

You should be able to see the streaking bits of comet-tail from just about anywhere in the US, but the darker the surrounding area, the better the viewing will be. If you can’t leave the city, just try to make it up to a rooftop somewhere. Many of the ‘shooting stars’ are so bright you can see them through the ambient city light.

I always look forward to the Perseids showers. The streaks from the meteors can be almost any color you can imagine, from yellows to greens to blues and reds. Of course, most are the usual bright white, but that just makes the unusual colors of the others that much more impressive.

I am Jon, with my eyes to the sky.

EdgeOn